art, artist, charcoal, Deacu, drawing, expression, giant, introspection, life, meditation, meditative, memory, old man, portrait, reflection, remember, Romanian, sculptor, sculpture, silence, study, talent, thinking, thought, wisdom
above, apparent, appearance, apple, below, bus, city, creation, feeling, inward, Law Of Attraction, life, meaning, mirror, mood, objective reality, old lady, orange, outward, principle, reality, reflection, relationship, resonance, road, simple, street, subjective reality, thought, urban, vibration, window, yellow
How the simple reflection of a light emitting object on an otherwise transparent surface can change the amount of light, thus definition and perception of the objects in that room. There are a lot of these in our own minds … But we are not aware of many of them yet.
We are constantly a sum of our past thoughts. At least that’s what classic physics say. Or we could be quantum, but haven’t yet developed a mechanism for being aware of that. Could we do something today because of something that happens in the future? Oh wait… All the time!
Past and future reflecting on the now. And you happening to be in the eye of the now. How can some people call this life boring, I have no idea.
Our subconscious mind eludes what we think we know.
How many times were our decisions based on what were only reflections of other concepts? Do we know and can we measure how many “glass walls” did a reflection of an energy wave, created by a thought crossed? Since every concept is a collective process to some degree, how can we tell we made a decision, or if it was made for us? Do we actually own any decision at all?
At least we do get to choose the amount of our former self gets to be carried on into our future self. Or do we?…
Sometimes we get the big answers by accident. I think the world around us is full of such accidents, if we look closely.
actual, apparent, appearence, beyond, comtemplation, consciousness, evolution, future, human, measure, meditation, nonphysical, physical, present, questions, real, reality, sense, sensors, separation, subconscious, temporary, thought, unseen, wonder, world
We call physical something that we can sense and measure. But if our sensors became more refined, we would probably sense what today call nonphysical, and thus the separation we once tought was real would disappear and we would be forced to call the thing a different name. I wonder what would it be.
bead, become, cells, Chakra, connection, consciousness, creative, creativity, DNA, dream, expansion, feeling, human, intention, journey, knowing, memory, mirror, moment, mystery, ocean, onenness, portal, Sacral, sensation, senses, slow motion, space, spiral, stars, temporary, thinking, thought, time, Universe, vibration, wave
A fleeting sensation, an expansion of a single moment, a connection between what is felt and what is known. A temporary recipient of memory. A wave of the ocean that decided to embark on a journey. A fragment of vibration in slow motion, melted by space, sustained by a mystery we all posses, in the very making of our cells, the same way the Universe holds it in all the stars and the distances that make it.
I rest in this knowing, feeling my path, gliding like a bead on a DNA spiral of an intention. I am one with the mirror I find here, the portal to oneness, the dream that becomes.
A thought, undeniable, like the foam of an ocean wave.
30s, 32, Abraham, align, bacon, brain, Chakra, evening, food porn, happy, humna, intelligence, journal, low protein, meditation, moment, movies, nature, negative spiral, note, now, OBE, projecting, reality, relax, rhythms, self, spiritual, spring, sun, thought, toxic, update, winter
Be happy where you are now, with what you have.
This was a day with a spring scent. Information from the weekend still settling down in my brain. Didn’t get to make pancakes. But tomorrow is another day. Saw a few clips on OBE, got my Abraham fix and managed to make a short trip in the sun in the afternoon. I’m still trying to figure out who had this idea of us humans getting inside these opaque boxes for most of our day, in which little sunshine, little fresh air gets in… We miss the rhythms of the nature, in our eyes, and ears, and pores… but we don’t know it yet. OK, some of us do, but most still don’t unfortunately… Ate low in protein at breakfast and lunch, and by the time I got back home had extreme fantasies with some… you know… bacon. Then got them fulfilled. Then had my second quarter of glass of wine this year and saw a short movie. And just like that, my day is over. Not my day, but my fuel. This is what 32 feels like. How am I supposed to handle a boyfriend or a pet? My phone is kinda kinky. He says “touch to update google hangouts” and stuff… I don’t use more than half that crap. I’m afraid to “touch”. Lol. It might update things I didn’t even know existed before :)))) This is how you know you’re getting old. Faster than how people got old 30 years ago. So anyway, I started wishing for a lot of things, you know, that feeling you have when the day is almost over and you didn’t do much. At least I didn’t drop my bag in the mud, like I did on Friday. No more aftermath washing. And even though your body can’t take it, you still send the commands. That’s what got me into a two months in bed health issue this winter. So, yeah, adjustments time! And after your brain realizes it is not in shape for some proactive awesome proof of human intelligent capacity – I mean even that was kinda hard to write – it goes: “hey, how about a movie? It’s still some type of cultural act, or at least it could be, 10 years from now.” So I said to myself I can’t do this shit all the time. This projecting of what could have been is highly toxic and negative spiral inducing. So how about just being extremely happy with things exactly the way they are? After all not one moment has ever contained the perfect ingredients or perfect outcome. There are always seeds of improvement in anything that exists in our reality, and even the realities to which we measure our own. I think when that impeccable moment comes, all life will cease to exist. So maybe it was the wine, maybe all the spiritual practices I’ve been endeavoring in – including some chakra aligning – although I’m sure it was both, but I just decided to relax, let the usual feeling pass through me instead of resisting it, and got really grateful for all the wonderfully crappy and unbearably, food-porn-like-good things in my life. And I think I heard my brain say thank you. :)) Yes, our efforts should settle by the time the sun checks in on the other side of the planet. But we never seem to get that. Sometimes I have the feeling we race computers. What a sad specie we are.
But getting back to my initial thought stream… how can we be happy with more, tomorrow, if we don’t know how to be happy with what we have today? The Now contains everything we need. Every moment is another teacher of that. Ah! The taste of non-self-persecution!
This is probably one of my most journal-like posts since I started the blog. I wonder how will all this sound in the morning… I should make tea.
Yeah, this was supposed to be a short note. Better luck next time I guess.
bones, branches, cold, cosmos, deaf, Earth, energy, field, frail, frozen, howling, ice, invisible, joy, light, love, memeories, morning, mystery, paradox, plane, road, snowflake, stars, thought, travel, Universe, wind, winter
A time for every color of your past, the silence of what is too insignificant to last.
Woke up to the dry howling of the wind and thought about how we lost the sun again today. Cussed at the making of the Universe, the Earth and the cosmos, and the distance between the planets and the stars, this distance which makes it easier, or harder to go on, for us small creatures, …and at the frail making of my bones, which never loved cold, but which have always been loved by it. It found a space to thrive and dwell, to tell its stories once again. About how structures of this plane crack inside and lose their shape under its weight, how the light travels faster, the minutes grow longer, and love gets easier, because in these silent times there are not so many directions to take so easily anymore. “You’re not welcome here”. But the cold is always deaf.
Slowed down by the weight of my clothes and my thoughts, I roll my steps on the salty ice dust, to meet my brief destiny of today. The cold now sits on the branches of this plane, ruling the morning still, stretched like a thin, poisonous, invisible octopus over the trapped memories, inside the evidence of the past warm rays.
The road ahead changed overnight into a white mystery, a visual spectacle for an audience who will never get the pains that make it. A rare chance to experience the frozen energy field around each and every leaf, the trace of the blizzard stamped on the trees.
Eternal paradox of the snowflake melted by the very warmth of the joy it brings.
I don’t wanna worry about the road or the destination anymore, or if and how I’m gonna get there. I just wanna take this moment in, drifting away into the vastness, on the sound of a electronic soft jazz tune, with my eyes closed and my heart open.
afraid, air, anger, answers, artists, ask, attention, bad, balance, behave, bigger, blaming game, body, Books, brain, burden, campaign, care, change, chilly, choice, communication, conformist, conquered, consciously, control, creation, creativity, critic, death, decisions, denying, disease, divine, doctor, dreams, education, ego, envy, execute, facts, faster, fear, feelings, feminine, first place, fortune tellers, God, good, greed, growth, human, in tune, inside, instincts, intolerance, jealousy, life, living in the mind, losers, love, manifestation, manipulate, masculine, Masculinity, masons, matter, meditation, mentality, mind, monk, natural catastrophes, natural food, need, negative, news, nurturing, old laws, opportunities, ourselves, outcomes, pain, paradox, permission, persecution, personal drama, philosophers, philosophy, pill, pollution, positive growth, poverty, power, priest, problem, purpose, questions, quick fix, rabit holes, race, racism, reason, record, reflect, reflex, relatable, resonating, reveal, sabotage, sacred, sacrifice, second place, self judgement, servants, settled for less, signals, sleep, society, solutions, space, spirit, stillness, strings, stronger, sun, thought, to be possesive, true, underlying, understand, Universe, unsurpassable, victimhood, victims, violence, war, water, whole, work, world, worthy
Until a few years ago, I was my worst critic. I never ran short of negative self judgement. I kinda felt there were other ways to do things, but it seemed like everybody else around me did it, so I thought, well, who am I to do otherwise? Not to be mistaken for a conformist. I did it my way. 🙂 But I was living in the mind.
I’m not gonna go into the how and why I got there, because I would probably need to write a book to tell the whole story. But I can give you a glimpse of what it looks like, and what I think of it, as I am still shaking off the last bits and cutting off the last strings of the burden that it has built around me and my life, while being attached to it. Some may even be feeling a bit of relatableness 🙂 So grab a cup of tea, this will be, at times, a bit… chilly.
I know how cruel the life of those living only in the mind is, because I did it too, for a long time.
It’s a cold place, which you constantly try to warm up with ego things and you never quite manage to.
Every time you think you made it, something, someone bigger, faster, stronger, will dwarf you.
It’s the way of the world, the natural process of growth. And yet, when you are in the mind and live off the land of ego, nothing will soothe the pain, since you only play for the first, spotless place.
Anything which starts with the second place and goes downwards, is for losers.
Sure, this way to live and be has made our race stronger… or did it?
Did we learn to keep our tears inside? Are we more ourselves now?
Are we pleased?
Outcomes and underlayings
Poverty, violence, war, racism, old laws that cause injustice, pollution, intolerance, disease.
The personal dramas, the natural catastrophes,
a picture of an earth that seems to forgive the bad and punish the good.
Yet, these are not the real problems, in the sense that they are not unsurpassable. All these things have solutions. Real ones.
On paper, everybody knows them. Sadly, in practice, there’s something underneath them, which constantly sabotages their fulfillment: the underlying ones. Instead of allowing ourselves to thrive and soar, our efforts seem like stones in a game of backward Tetris, unconsciously dissolving everything that’s on top. Those underlying problems aren’t complicated, and not hard to understand, but we lack the muscle for it; and they are simple in fact: we don’t take care of our bodies and we live in the mind. Sounds too easy, doesn’t it? You would think that we are here for higher purposes, right? Well, what if that higher purpose would start to reveal its true nature only after you solved these first two?
Vessels of life
If we would just take a moment, and stay still, and reflect.
I’m not sure which is worst, ignoring your body or believing you are your mind.
Both however make a recipe for disaster.
We think that we don’t have to listen to our bodies, but to everything else around them; when actually, the Universe is within us too. We know what we need, so that we can function at an optimal level. But we just don’t want to. We can’t. We need to many permissions, it has to first be all over the news. We need a campaign and a montage!
Denying the very space inside of us, and its requirements, is what leads to the primary structure on which we sew our negative emotions, bad feelings and unwanted outcomes.
Nothing would be simpler, and yet more effective, than to turn inside. Yet somehow, most of us spend a lifetime running away from it, in this mad quest for an ever-eluding picture of happiness and what we are taught it should be.
In a fast paced world, nobody seems to have the time for such un-graspable matters.
When did we decide that this formula would be good for ourselves:
don’t eat natural foods
don’t drink water
don’t get fresh air and sun
don’t get enough sleep?
Not listening to our bodies is actually not listening to the divine power that created us, call it whatever you fancy. We tool and harden them, instead of loving them. It seems easier, although it’s a bad long-term management decision. In time, it will prove to be harder.
Why do we do it?
because for so many years, we have been taught how to imitate an ideal that serves the industrial type of productivity, we scheduled our hours and efficiency, trying to imitate machines.
A German might call me a Greek. But this is not about disproving what already is, it’s just to ask: what do we really still need?
We ignore the little signals until they become a huge cry, then we go to the doctor and get quick fixes or permanent ones. Society loves sacrifice stories, but do we still need them to feel worthy?
Back to the mind: when you only live in it, or mostly in it, you make a choice of being its servant, instead of making it your servant. Everything has to be a challenge, in order to reaffirm your choice; a mountain, something to be conquered. Stillness is death.
We have an overly masculine approach on everything, even though femininity is the symbol for creation, creativity and nurturing, thus for positive growth.
Maybe applying a few feminine principles would spare us greatly of the negative outcomes we face.
Maybe the two, the masculine and the feminine, should be sewed in a more balanced manner into most decisions, if not all decisions. How would the world look then?
One paradox of the mind is that, although it doesn’t have all the facts, it behaves as though it has only the negative possible ones. Then, it shuts down or ignores the communication with the heart, and makes perfect excuses for distrusting it all. God forbid we should accept we need attention or to love ourselves, before we first hammer ourselves into avoiding to acknowledge that. It’s an acquired reflex. There’s no need for a teacher or a supervisor, we can punish the self and the others without any help. What’s better than persecution? Self-persecution. We’ve become masters of the blaming game, always on a lookout for possible candidates, that we can offer some home-made anger treats to.
We embrace the ego so tightly and then ask the divine to give us answers for why our lives aren’t better than they are. We like greed, envy, jealousy, to be possessive, to control and manipulate; we think maybe if we keep going like that, we will somehow imitate true power. They’re like artificial sweeteners and hydrogenated fats in your desert, a brief somewhat pleasurable taste, but then they damage all tissues they come in contact with…
Mindfulness? slow food? grinding your own coffee? meditation? Ain’t nobody got time for that!
A shadow of reason
We’ve become so skilled into shooting our own dreams down.
When did we decide the power to change is not ours?
When did we outsource responsibility?
At what point did we accept to be in a constant state of unworthiness?
Was it when philosophers first came to be, when they seemed to be people destined to solve problems which required (more) time to think?
It seemed deep thinking and rabbit holes were for philosophers, creativity was for artists, building houses was for masons, and the matters of the spirit were for priests and monks.
Did that left the rest of the people with in-between jobs (purposes)?
Do we go to fortune tellers and truly expect them to map out our next moves, when in truth, the map is inside us, and we, subconsciously or consciously, draw it ourselves as we go?
Was it in our education over the years, the mentality that brought us to record and execute, but not to understand?
Why do we let our bodies and our lives to something else other than our own hands?
We settled for less. Probably because it seemed easier to appear as victims, than to appear as anything stronger than that.
Responsibility means accountability, nobody wants that. The victim cannot be guilty, right?
We’ve mistaken instincts for feelings, and to be powerful with being destructive or unchangeable.
Why is it so hard for people to fight for what they know is best for them?
Is it because they don’t know they can ask for it?
Are we afraid of being called “lazy”, “a wuss”, “a rebel”? What’s the label you fear most?
Who do you need permission from to be yourself and claim your right to wellbeing?
The demons that live inside and around you need your permission too. They feed primarily on fear. They grow stronger with each dive into anger, and each fake desert you have.
And at what point did the mind became the only seemingly reliable tool?
“Here’s a soul: now go on living like you don’t have one.” Wouldn’t we all be just brains? How creepy would that be?
We should understand that we have been given a sacred space and vessel of communication, and that we are obligated to care for it the best way we can.
We should see that only in this space we share the management position with the power that created us.
We should understand that having a brain does not mean we only have that. The mind is but a servant. Someone said that the mind is the captain that stirs the boat, but not the boat itself.
We are a resonating space, that when let to it, goes in tune with all universal forces. Being there for ourselves is what gives way for that to happen.
We are the ones that shut down the opportunities which lie on the other side of victimhood.
Our bodies are meant to move us and hold our spirits.
Stepping across that line between fear and manifestation of our inner gifts is what drives the human spirit after all. Caring for yourself is caring for the way you care for others. When you are not whole, you can’t give the same way you would as when being that way.
Let the bridges between your heart and your mind reconnect. Let them go together. Then tie back the loose ends of your body’s needs, these are two gifts you can give yourself anytime, that no one else can give you. Make yourself whole again, that is how you first came here anyway.
Versiunea în română: https://soulpatterns.wordpress.com/2013/06/07/doua-lucruri/
…made from the same cloth, thus connected in that unexplainable, yet undeniable way.
…făcuţi din acelaşi material; inexplicabil, dar fără indoială, conectaţi.
I like finding connections and exploring all aspects of life, I like making (“new”) sense of it all, I like how coffee changes the way you do things, I like yellow, Greece and Van Gogh.
Then I like stripes, because they remind me of the energy waves that move around us, upon us, through us and inside us.
I like the story told by a man’s face and I like knowing what shapes the path of thought, from our minds and our hearts, by our hands, on the canvas of the world, to build and to destroy, to write, love, play and tell.
I am another being, on another spiral, just like you, maybe like the ones on the stary skies of impressionism.
I am a transparent cube trying to retain the light and sometimes feeling like I could erase my own reflection from the shiny floor.
I go with the flow and share my findings, while at times influencing its course, other times starting a new one.
I am a black and white fractal of diffusions, “desideri” and needs, or I color myself tenderly overimposed onto your filter structure.
I leave a trace and although I can’t justify it all, you get me, because we are both from the same cloth.
I get stuck, or lost, or levitate in a dream.
I am a future object of your subjectivity, with carvings of impatience and greed, laughs, orange zest and movie streets.
I am probably late for some things and early for others.
I get speechless and grateful, I oversleep and start again.
Join me on my journey in a world of connection and wonder, while we inspire and question each other.
Versiunea în română: https://soulpatterns.wordpress.com/2013/03/03/ce-mi-place-si-cine-sunt/